My suitcase lay open, half packed, on the floor. There is so much more to pack and I seem to be running out of time. How did I take so much away on vacation with me and why am I finding it difficult to corral all of my possessions- mostly clothes— into this one suitcase?
I wake up to discover that I have had my most frequently recurring dream yet again. What does it mean this time? What challenge am I ready to take on? What do I need to leave behind?
My world changed both subtly and profoundly during the winter break. Instead of going away for the holidays, my older son moved across the country while my younger son reordered his own life. The changes were sudden and, while not unexpected, shifted my daily interactions and my orientation with my children. It’s a new world order. We’re in the next stage of life. Change is inevitable and ultimately positive, and it is a shift that I need to embrace.
I have embraced change often in my life and in my career. I have welcomed the journey even when I haven’t enjoyed all of it. And just when I think I’m “there”, I start again. This is the nature of being fully present in my life. While this recent change is manifesting itself in my lower back, my mind is ready to accept it. The awareness of my current experience in both body and mind leads me to reaffirm my own desire for an examined life, to ensure that I am not just skimming the surface. As I seek order out of chaos (hence, the endless packing), I have the opportunity to revisit who I am, what I believe in, and how I engage with the world.
An examined life inspires us to reconsider our most firmly held beliefs and helps us appreciate other viewpoints. What is my life about, really? What am I called to do with it? What do I value and what will I commit to in 2020?
My values of truth and loyalty guide me toward authentic relationships. I seek to deeply engage in causes and issues that are bigger than me. I aspire to make a difference in the lives of people with whom I come into contact, whether they be clients, friends, family, or people with whom I have my daily interactions. I want to show up, be present, listen well, and love more.
I welcome 2020, its changes, and the new chapter in our lives. And I hope to finish packing.